Defero/Morium (GJ)
Elijah: That's my point. My point is...you're evil. That's my point.
Mary Kate: i may or may not be evil...the jury's still out on that one, love.
Elijah: Yeah, well, this jury has a hard line conclusion. Now it's just time to figure out if evil is a good thing or a bad thing.
Mary Kate: everything about me is good baby...you just haven't experienced it to know
Elijah: EXCEPT FOR YOUR SEXUAL FRUSTRATIONAL TORMENT.
Mary Kate: And I've barely done anything...if we were in person...mmm
Elijah: Sigh. Ick. I'm not so much a fan that you can effect me like this.
Mary Kate: why not?
Elijah: I've explained this...I like being in control. And you're making that hard.
Mary Kate: I'd say from the sounds of your frustration thats not the only thing i'm making hard
Elijah: AHAHA.
Mary Kate: it had to be said
Elijah: YOU GET A MILLION POINTS.
Mary Kate: Hell yes I do
Mary Kate:...did you?
Elijah: I don't think that's a very fair question to ask me.
Mary Kate: Why not?
Mary Kate: I'd answer you if you asked
Elijah: I guess I've just never had a girl ask me if I...er...took care of myself after she intentionally got me flustered when she knew very well I was alone.
Mary Kate: Well, I'm not like most girls.
Elijah: I'm finding this out more and more every day that passes.
Mary Kate: is it a good thing?
Elijah: Sigh, ugh, yes. I took care of it.
Mary Kate: Good.
Elijah: Maybe I'll build up defenses against you, transformer style.
Mary Kate: Hahahaa, the nerdness i adore so much
Mary Kate: Don't build defenses against me....you'll just feel bad when they don't work
Elijah: OH-HO! I'll figure out how to take you down. Give me a little bit...and some sleep.
Mary Kate: You can try...
Elijah: YOU'RE DONE. I'll go all Optimus Prime on your ass.
Mary Kate: Hahahaaaaa
Mary Kate: what happened to fighting BY MY SIDE whether sith or jedi?
Elijah: You turned the tables. You started fighting me! When was the last time you saw Obi-Wan trying to get Luke's pants off him?
Mary Kate: Han tried to get Leias off....they were on the same side
Elijah: Yeah and then Luke kissed Leia, so obviously standard operating procedures don't apply.
Mary Kate: he didnt know it was his sister, doesnt count
Mary Kate: i'm right
Mary Kate: you know it
Elijah: You're going to be the C3PO to my R2D2 aren't you?
Mary Kate: hahahaa...you are the only man I'd ever want to make out with who could get away with these references
Mary Kate: lets see how many times i can say the word fuck tonight
Elijah: Sounds like a good game.
Mary Kate: I've come to a conclusion by the way...
Elijah: Oh yes?
Mary Kate: There's going to come a day when theres a concert you want to see, some amazing live music....and I'm going to go with you...and I'm going to wear a little black dress...and no panties....and we'll play the lets see how many times MK can say "fuck" backstage.
Elijah: CAUSE OF DEATH:
MARY KATE OLSEN.
Mary Kate: and you will love every minute of it
Elijah: Jesus Christ, I love you.
Mary Kate: I love you too baby. I'm gonna make all your fantasies comes true...even ones you didn't know you had.
Elijah: What the hell did I do to deserve you? Alright, I'm getting off this thing.
Mary Kate: I ask myself that question about you everyday.
Elijah: Unfortunately for my pysche I do love it. You're going to kill me one day, I'm sure of it.
Mary Kate: But you'll die happy, love
Elijah: It's true. It'll say it right on my death certificate though. Cause of Death:
Mary Kate Olsen.
Mary Kate: this is the first time I've smiled all day, you're so wonderful.
Elijah: I do what I can. I'd ress in woman's clothing and dance around to the spice girls if it would make you smile.
Mary Kate: Have I ever told you how sexy you looked with the mohawk?
Elijah: No, actually, you haven't. I kinda dug it too.
Mary Kate: just wait baby, it'll be like wicked nerd foreplay
Elijah: DEAD.
AnotherMagazine (GJ)
Elijah: Um. Get out. It was fantastic.
Mary Kate: no, I'M fantastic
Elijah: No, you're MK, which has a side benefit of being fantastic 99.9% of the time.
Mary Kate: .1% loss for not laughing at your lame joke?
Elijah: EXACTLY.
Elijah: Hush. Anyway, we doin't have any popsicles.
Mary Kate: yes we do, i hid them in the back of the freezer so you wouldnt eat them
Mary Kate: behind the 3 month old veggie burgers
Elijah: That you're never going to eat.
Mary Kate: but they're serving a purpose
Elijah: What? Hiding the popsicles?
Mary Kate: yes
Matt: you guys are crazy
Mary Kate: we really are.
Mary Kate: its good for the relationship
Elijah: you talk to her consistantly. As if anyone who wasn't crazy could be with her.
Mary Kate: ....
Mary Kate: and elijah jordan....i dont know how to take that
Elijah: You don't know how to take that....I was saying you're nuts. But so am I.
Mary Kate: exactly
Elijah: And all I'm saying is that is what makes this work.
Mary Kate: aww baby, so sweeet
Elijah: Yeahyeah, I know. I'm a ball of sweetness tonight.
Elijah: So there's this guy about five seats up from me. He got on at the last stop and he keeps looking back at me. I'm trying to figure out if it's be prudent to pretend Hanks is my boyfriend to scare him off or not.
Mary Kate: ...
Mary Kate: if you grab hanks and kiss him RIGHT ON THE MOUTH, i'll totally forgive you for it
Elijah: AHAHA. Hanks might not.
Mary Kate: Tell him I'll give him a thousand dollars
Mary Kate: he'll forgive you
Elijah: i don't know if kissing hanks is worth it. according to him, he's getting weird diseases from being on the bus.
Mary Kate: Hahaha, it would be FUNNY though
Elijah: True. By Hanks might punch me before i get to the you giving him a grand part.
Mary Kate: so heres what you do....you write him a little note, say "mk is going to give you a thousand dollars is you dont hit me or hate me for this"
Mary Kate: then when he looks over at you
Mary Kate: LAY ONE ON HIM
Elijah: Nah. Mischa'll get upset.
Mary Kate: i highly doubt it
Mary Kate: she told me she wouldn't hate me if i hit him in the face, why would she hate you for a stupid kiss?
Elijah: because, it might be weird. not everyone is down with their husbands kissing other guys.
Elijah: Do you want me to call Hannah and have her come sleep with you?
Elijah: Wait.
Mary Kate: hahahaa
Elijah: That's...
Mary Kate: yes Elijah, I want your sister to come sleep with me
Elijah: well, ya know, she looks so much likeme
Mary Kate: I'm bringing another man into our bed
Elijah: O RLY?
Mary Kate: add all that together and you got it
Mary Kate: youre a creepy thing
Elijah: AND YET...you sleep with me.
Mary Kate: According to Dom, I am the one ring. the good side of it anyway.
Elijah: I did warn you about Dom's delusions right?
Elijah: ;]
Mary Kate: And then Jared called me precious...totally confirmed it